Season Preview: Milwaukee Brewers

Well we've got 15 days left until Opening Day, which means it's season preview time. We'll be running it down team by team, with an added new wrinkle this time around: the beer of choice for fans of the team to enjoy whilst watching their team take the field! Nothing like that to help get you through a baseball season, especially if you're from Pittsburgh. Up next: the Milwaukee Brewers


Lineup: This should be the best lineup in the division. Ryan Braun and Prince Fielder make this merry-go-round move, but the speedy Carlos Gomez and (we think) ready to (finally!) break out Rickie Weeks will be superb complementary pieces. Corey Hart had a down year last season, but if he makes one simple fix (swing more! His in-the-strike-zone swing percentage dipped 8% from 2008-2009 and his overall swing percentage dipped from 54% to 46%) then he should rebound to his above-average past. Casey McGehee, despite the goofy spelling of his last name, was a good contributor last season, and should be a serviceable stopgap for prospect Mat Gamel. And speaking of prospects, SS Alcides Escobar is a wizard with the glove and should be able to hit for some decent average this season. Gregg Zaun is the only distinct negative here, but he's a catcher, and there aren't a lot of teams who can count on having a reliable hitter behind the dish, so that doesn't concern us too much.


Rotation: What does concern us is the pitching. Yovani Gallardo is a stud, and the unquestioned ace of what is, unfortunately, an extremely mediocre staff. Randy Wolf was a nice free agent signing, but right now, he looks like their second-best starter...and that's not a recipe for contention. Doug Davis and Jeff Suppan (whom we always confuse, despite their being altogether dissimilar save for a distinct tendency towards 'average') will man the 3 and 4 spots here, and the 5th spot will likely go to Manny Parra or Dave Bush. Honestly, we'd rather see them admit the mistake that was the Suppan signing and send him to the bullpen and use both Parra and Bush as full-time starters, but the likelihood of a middle-market team like the Brewers admitting a sunk cost on an investment (however ill-advised) as expensive as Suppan is extremely slim. So they've got six nominal starters, but no one to be especially excited for.


Bullpen: The same is true of the bullpen. Trevor Hoffman continues to break his own all-time saves record with every game he closes out, but he's 43. And that, if you're unclear, is never, ever a good thing for a professional athlete. LaTroy Hawkins is the setup man here, which let's just move on before we start laughing too hard to finish this; Carlos Villanueva (whom we still feel should be a starter for a team with enormous rotation deficiencies viz the Brew Crew) is a potent arm in the 'pen, and you could do worse than Todd Coffey. But David Riske and Schott Schoeneweis are has-beens, and unless Claudio Vargas proves that 2009 wasn't a fluke, there are not a lot of reliable options here. 


Overall: This team can hit with the best of them, but the pitching is lacking save for a few (ok, very few) bright spots. Yovani Gallardo, Carlos Villanueva, Claudio Vargas, and maybe Randy Wolf are the only really reliable arms here, which won't be enough to compensate for the impressive lineup that the latter-day Harvey's Wallbangers will be trotting out. 


Predicted Record: 77-85, 4th place NL Central


Beer: Miller High Life. Yeah, it's cheap and not, like, a good beer. But when it's ice cold (like the early season in Milwaukee) then it's an enormously refreshing brew (which is key come the humid Milwaukee winters). Plus, y'know, Miller sponsors their park, so there's that. And all of that was a prelude to the fact that this franchise probably won't have the money to retain the wonderfully talented - but prohibitively expensive - core of Prince Fielder, Ryan Braun, and Yovani Gallardo. So...um...at least the beer is cheap!

Season in Haiku: Milwaukee Brewers

Prince needs to get gone.

Hardy, we hardly knew ye.

But hey, Yovani!

Entire Indians' Bullpen Arrested for Arson

Pictured: Flames Engulf Progressive Field

CLEVELAND, OH - Heartening news for Indians fans tonight, as word has just come down that the entire Indians relief corps has been placed under arrest for arson.  The group was apprehended after a particularly egregious episode of firestarting behavior while on national television late Monday night, during a game against the Milwaukee Brewers. 

The Brewers were trailing by 4 runs in the top of the 8th inning, 12-8.  As the score indicated, both teams were hitting the ball well.  "We really felt like our guys were giving us a chance to win up there at the plate," said beleaguered Indians manager Eric Wedge.  "You usually feel pretty comfortable with your chances to pick up a win when you put up 12 like that."

And yet, signs of the Indians relievers apparent torching of their team's chances surfaced as early as the 6th inning.  Cleveland boasted an 8-6 lead after both starters submitted lackluster performances, but RHP Greg Aquino allegedly surrendered a single to Milwaukee SS J.J. Hardy, who advanced to second on a subsequent single, then to third on an Aquino wild pitch.  Witnesses say he scored shortly after, as 2B Craig Counsell hit a sacrifice fly to score him.  

With the score 8-7, the action turned to the 7th.  The Indians, evidently feeling the imminent implosion, scored 4 more runs to create a 5-run lead.  And yet, according to witnesses, Aquino was docked another run in the bottom of the frame when his runner, Ryan Braun, scored after Corey Hart hit a sacrifice fly against RHP Luis Vizcaino.  Brewers relievers held fast in the top of the 8th, at which point Vizcaino allegedly took his fateful turn on the mound.

What follow is all according to witness testimony.  Vizcaino induced a flyout on the first batter, then walked the next two, prompting his removal.  At this point, RHP Matt Herges entered the game, promptly walking a third batter and then surrendering an RBI single to LF Ryan Braun.  With the bases loaded, Wedge signaled for left-handed Rafael Perez to pitch to Milwaukee's left-handed slugger, Prince Fielder.  This was done to gain a tactical advantage over the hitter; however, the reader will note that Perez, to this point, was allowing left-handed batters to hit at a .382/.463/.529 clip.  If true, this information suggests that Wedge may have been complicit in the ensuing inferno.

Immediately subsequent to Perez's entry, he allegedly grooved a fastball on the inner half of the plate to Fielder, who deposited it in the right-center field stands for a grand slam and the 13-12 lead.  Perez then remained in the game, allowing a single, a walk, and then another single to add gasoline to the blaze.  At 14-12, bystander Joe Smith entered the scene and put out the raging flames with a lineout and a strikeout of the final two batters of the game.

"It's just something where you see something awful going on, and do what you can to stop it," explained Smith after the game.  "It's really just a case where I think that anyone would've done what I did."

Cleveland fans seemed glad to see that perceived justice was being upheld.  "These guys have just been running wild for too long," said Angela Lang, a fan in Section 307 at Progressive Field.  "It's good that we're finally taking steps to get these guys off the streets."  

While this is the first time the bullpen has officially been brought up on charges, they have been suspected in previous firestarting episodes throughout the season.  The group as a whole has been involved with 11 blown saves as compared to 12 saves, and, as a whole, provides negative support for their starting pitchers, at .671 runs below average - meaning starters sacrifice .671 runs every time the bullpen takes over.  Further, only two of them has a sub-4.00 ERA in at least 10 innings of action, though the aforementioned Perez's ERA actually went down from the 15.00-range to just under 12 after last night's performance.  

Defense attorneys seem likely to point to this improvement as well as the demotion of Masa Kobayashi after 9.1 innings as evidence that the pitchers are trying to rehabilitate themselves and also that team is aware of and trying to correct the heinous actions of their bullpen.  There also remains the question of how to try Matt Herges; his 1.93 ERA in 18 innings suggests that tonight's actions constituted a first-time offense that does not deserve the same punishment as repeat offenders like, for example, free agent signee Kerry Wood.

The trial proceedings are scheduled to begin at some point this week.  The bullpen, with the exception of Smith, are being held on bail in Cuyahoga County Jail.  The group is facing charges of first-degree arson, which carries a sentence of 5-15 years of prison time as well as a $50,000 fine each.  Prosecutors say they are going to seek the maximum allowable penalties.