Because we just haven't gotten our fill of making incredibly inaccurate predictions, we've decided it's time to compile all those season previews and write out a proper predictions post. Or maybe we just wanted the chance to write that little bit of alliteration. SPRING BREAK!
Ahem. Onward and upward. Teams will be listed in their predicted order of divisional finish, and we'll throw out our projected record and beer choice for each. Think of it as a handy reference guide to all those other posts. Joke's on you if you read them all, we guess.
NL East:
1. Phillies: 91-71, Samuel Smith's Imperial Stout
2. Braves: 88-74, Yuengling
3. Marlins: 79-83, Abita Christmas Ale
4. Mets: 76-86, Dos Equis
5. Nationals: 69-93, Schlitz
NL Central:
1. Cardinals: 89-73, Stone Face Ale
2. Cubs: 84-78, Lumpy Dog Light Lager
3. Reds: 82-80, Abita Amber
4. Brewers: 77-85, Miller High Life
5. Astros: 71-91, Lone Star
6. Pirates: 69-93, Steel Reserve 211
NL West:
1. Rockies: 93-69, Coors
2. Dodgers: 87-75, Anchor Summer Beer
3. Diamondbacks: 82-80, PBR (we already regret this pick as Brandon Webb is struggling to get healthy)
4. Giants: 82-80, Cuddly Panda Porter
5. Padres: 65-97, Blue Moon
NL Divisional Round: Rockies over Braves, Phillies over Cardinals
NL Championship: Rockies over Phillies
AL East:
1. Yankees: 95-67, Westvleteren 12
2. Rays: 94-68, Natural Ice
3. Red Sox: 93-69, Samuel Adams Boston Lager
4. Blue Jays: 78-84, Alexander Keith's IPA
5. Orioles: 70-92, Oak Aged Dark Lord Imperial Stout
AL Central:
1. Twins: 87-75, Molson Canadian Lager
2. Tigers: 83-79, Heineken
2. White Sox: 83-79, Goose Island Honker's Ale
4. Indians: 68-94, Great Lakes Brewing Co's Blackout Stout
5. Royals: 62-100, Negra Modelo
AL West:
1. Mariners: 86-76, Fat Tire
2. Rangers: 85-77, Shiner Bock
2. Angels: 85-77, Stone's Arrogant Bastard Ale
4. A's: 77-85, Sam Adams Light
AL Divisional Round: Yankees over Mariners, Rays over Twins
AL Championship Series: Rays over Yankees
World Series: Rockies over Rays
As we were writing the Rockies preview, we got progressively more excited about their chances. They can pitch (a legit ace in Ubaldo Jimenez, the return of groundballer Aaron Cook, the possible return of former ace Jeff Francis, an improving Jorge de la Rosa, and a very strong bullpen even without Huston Street) and hit (there's a good chance that they can best league average at all 8 spots on the diamond, with a few possible star turns from guys like Troy Tulowitzki and the young outfielders) with anyone. We don't like the Yankees' lack of depth, but admit that they're still the clear favorite to take it all this year, and, again, have a like fetish for the Rays. So now you know exactly why we'll be wrong, instead of the less definitive 'oh, you were wrong.' Oh, and for fun, let's take a crack at the seasonal awards, so we can dig an even deeper prognosticative hole:
AL MVP: Evan Longoria (runners up: M. Teixeira, A. Rodriguez, K. Youkilis)
AL Cy Young: Felix Hernandez (runners up: Z. Greinke, J. Lester, B. Anderson)
AL RoY: Brian Matusz (runners up: S. Sizemore, W. Davis)
AL Manager: Don Wakamatsu (runners up: J. Maddon, R. Gardenhire)
NL MVP: Albert Pujols (runners up: T. Tulowitzki, J. Werth, J. Upton)
NL Cy Young: T. Lincecum (runners up: D. Haren, R. Halladay, J. Johnson)
NL RoY: Jason Heyward (runners up: B. Posey, S. Strasburg)
NL Manager: Bobby Cox (runners up: T. LaRussa, C. Manuel)
Showing posts with label philadelphia phillies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label philadelphia phillies. Show all posts
4/4/10
3/26/10
Season Preview: Philadelphia Phillies
Well we've got 10 (we just realized that we've been counting down til April 5th. Because we're nothing if not attentive.) days left until Opening Day, which means it's season preview time. We'll be running it down team by team, with an added new wrinkle this time around: the beer of choice for fans of the team to enjoy whilst watching their team take the field! Nothing like that to help get you through a baseball season, especially if you're from Pittsburgh. Up next: the Philadelphia Phillies.
Lineup: The Phillies can hit the ball. That's this lineup summed up very briefly. Chase Utley is one of the best players in baseball, Ryan Howard is the premier power bat in the league, and Jayson Werth has been one of the most productive outfielders in the league in the past few years (no word how his new beard will affect his play). Jimmy Rollins used to be in the this discussion before his abysmal 2009 season, but it's not out of the question to think that he will rebound this year. Shane Victorino has made his case to be included in the group of elite hitters from this lineup, and should continue to improve. Beyond that group, Raul Ibanez is a decent enough hitter for left field, and you could do worse than to have Placido Polanco at third. Carlos Ruiz - CHOOCH! - will be the backstop for this squad, and while he's not much with the bat, he's shown quite a bit of flair with the glove. Basically, this team will get their runs - as long as their key contributors stay healthy. Because like the Yankees, there is not a lot of depth to be had here.
Rotation: They did improve by swapping Cliff Lee for Roy Halladay (ignoring all the other parts of the deal), but we're not so sure how good this group is going to be. Halladay and Hamels are a legitimate star-caliber 1/2, but to say that we have doubts about Joe Blanton, J.A. Happ, Kyle Kendrick, and Jamie Moyer is to put it lightly. Blanton showed an uptick in his strikeout rate recently, but we're not really buying it as he benefited from luck last season. Speaking of luck, Happ was extraordinarily lucky in 2009, and will be lucky to post a sub-4.50 FIP this season. Kendrick flat out doesn't have the skills to be in an MLB rotation, and Moyer, while he does have that veteran presence journalists love to write about, is in the same boat.
Bullpen: This is something of a weak spot. Brad Lidge - he of the perfect season in 2008 (saves-wise, which take from that what you will) - was historically awful last season, and has a lot to prove in 2010. Ryan Madson was often Lidge's relief (which never bodes well when you're talking about, y'know, a relief corps), but he's not exactly the kind of pitcher you entrust with significant amounts of high leverage appearances. But then the same could be said about Danys Baez, J.C. Romero, Chad Durbin, Mike Zagurski, David Herndon and Antonio Bastardo. And in case you're wondering, no, that does not bode well for the Phitins.
Overall: The Phils can hit the cover off the ball, and their 1/2 starters are hard to beat. Beyond that, though, you're talking about a very flawed squad. A lot is going to have to go right for them to be the dominant team that we've seen in recent years, but even without that, they should be talented enough to win the division. If, however, either Halladay or Hamels (and we simply cannot wait for the silly double-H merchandise to be printed up) falters or gets injured, then this team could be in some real trouble.
Predicted Record: 91-71, 1st place NL East
Beer: Samuel Smith's Imperial Stout. A potent lineup, the Phillies are equal to the 9% ABV that we see from (Slammin') Sammy Smith's powerful brew. Plus, Smith's is one of, if not the, best Imperial Stout out there - and the same can be said of the Phillies. It's not an inspired choice, to be sure, but hopefully it's heavy enough to keep Philly fans' mouths shut so they can appreciate - instead of complain about - a great team.
Lineup: The Phillies can hit the ball. That's this lineup summed up very briefly. Chase Utley is one of the best players in baseball, Ryan Howard is the premier power bat in the league, and Jayson Werth has been one of the most productive outfielders in the league in the past few years (no word how his new beard will affect his play). Jimmy Rollins used to be in the this discussion before his abysmal 2009 season, but it's not out of the question to think that he will rebound this year. Shane Victorino has made his case to be included in the group of elite hitters from this lineup, and should continue to improve. Beyond that group, Raul Ibanez is a decent enough hitter for left field, and you could do worse than to have Placido Polanco at third. Carlos Ruiz - CHOOCH! - will be the backstop for this squad, and while he's not much with the bat, he's shown quite a bit of flair with the glove. Basically, this team will get their runs - as long as their key contributors stay healthy. Because like the Yankees, there is not a lot of depth to be had here.
Rotation: They did improve by swapping Cliff Lee for Roy Halladay (ignoring all the other parts of the deal), but we're not so sure how good this group is going to be. Halladay and Hamels are a legitimate star-caliber 1/2, but to say that we have doubts about Joe Blanton, J.A. Happ, Kyle Kendrick, and Jamie Moyer is to put it lightly. Blanton showed an uptick in his strikeout rate recently, but we're not really buying it as he benefited from luck last season. Speaking of luck, Happ was extraordinarily lucky in 2009, and will be lucky to post a sub-4.50 FIP this season. Kendrick flat out doesn't have the skills to be in an MLB rotation, and Moyer, while he does have that veteran presence journalists love to write about, is in the same boat.
Bullpen: This is something of a weak spot. Brad Lidge - he of the perfect season in 2008 (saves-wise, which take from that what you will) - was historically awful last season, and has a lot to prove in 2010. Ryan Madson was often Lidge's relief (which never bodes well when you're talking about, y'know, a relief corps), but he's not exactly the kind of pitcher you entrust with significant amounts of high leverage appearances. But then the same could be said about Danys Baez, J.C. Romero, Chad Durbin, Mike Zagurski, David Herndon and Antonio Bastardo. And in case you're wondering, no, that does not bode well for the Phitins.
Overall: The Phils can hit the cover off the ball, and their 1/2 starters are hard to beat. Beyond that, though, you're talking about a very flawed squad. A lot is going to have to go right for them to be the dominant team that we've seen in recent years, but even without that, they should be talented enough to win the division. If, however, either Halladay or Hamels (and we simply cannot wait for the silly double-H merchandise to be printed up) falters or gets injured, then this team could be in some real trouble.
Predicted Record: 91-71, 1st place NL East
Beer: Samuel Smith's Imperial Stout. A potent lineup, the Phillies are equal to the 9% ABV that we see from (Slammin') Sammy Smith's powerful brew. Plus, Smith's is one of, if not the, best Imperial Stout out there - and the same can be said of the Phillies. It's not an inspired choice, to be sure, but hopefully it's heavy enough to keep Philly fans' mouths shut so they can appreciate - instead of complain about - a great team.
2/26/10
MLB Jam: Final Four
Only four teams remain in this epic battle of the basketballing baseballers! The wheat has been separated from the chaff, the cream has risen to the top, and so on and so forth. In the AL side, it's a showdown of epic proportions between Joe Mauer's Twins and Matt Wieters' Orioles; in the Senior Circuit, Matt Kemp's Dodgers and Ryan Howard's Phillies were the NL's top dogs last season. Will the Dodgers make up for their playoff failings? Will the Phillies add another (imaginary) trophy to their mantle? Will the Mauer/Wieters showdown leave us all too utterly in awe to even tell you about it? Those answers, and more, are coming right up. As always, games to 21, 2's and 3's, call own fouls, and let's get a champ ee yun ship game squared away!
Game 1: (5) Minnesota Twins vs. (13) Baltimore Orioles
Players: Joe Mauer/Pat Neshek vs. Matt Wieters/Brian Matusz
The Orioles are the lowest seed to advance this far in tournament history (admittedly, perhaps not the most impressive record), and have done so on the strength of Matt Wieters' phenomenal swag. The Twins have overcome a pair of formidable title contenders (Rangers, Yankees) because of Joe Mauer's dominance. We don't mind saying that this has been the most hotly anticipated pairing of the tournament; it's a regular ratings bonanza (relatively speaking). And from the outset, neither team disappoints. It's a flurry of stunning crossovers, no-look assists, clean jumpers, and lockdown defense. Paradoxical? Maybe. Entertaining? You bet. The game stays deadlocked most of the way, until the Orioles start to pull ahead late as Matusz asserts his dominance over Neshek. The O's jump to a 19-16 lead, but Mauer ties it up from 3 after a crazy side-armed assist from Neshek that snakes through the legs of the unsuspecting Matusz. Tied 19-19, and unwilling to go through another epic showdown like they just had against, the Orioles were in a crucial spot. But there's a reason why Matt Wieters already has a Hall of Fame plaque and Joe Mauer doesn't. The thunderous game-winning alley-oop that he throws down isn't that reason, but it's pretty indicative, no? Orioles win, 21-19.
Game 2: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (2) Philadelphia Phillies
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard
These may be the top two seeds, but they certainly got here in strange ways. The Phillies won one game by virtue of playing only against 5'6'' Danny Ray-Herrera and another by the Rockies' rulebook recklessness, while the Dodgers advanced last round because of Matt Kemp's midget stripper. What we're saying is, this could go either way. The Dodgers size advantage seems to hurt them early, as Victorino, seemingly unencumbered by the ceremonial lei he's been insisting on wearing, darts around nimbly as ever, finishing around the rim and from the perimeter with equal aplomb. Kemp heats up from deep, though, draining a couple of three-pointers to put the Dodgers right back in it. Howard and Broxton wage a battle for the ages down on the blocks, trading subtle elbows and jostling constantly. Hook shots and drop step-layups abound from down around the basket, until as with the earlier game, we stand deadlocked at 19. Victorino had been somewhat quiet, seemingly worn down, but he turned on the jets and streaked past a flatfooted Kemp on the way to the hole...only to find himself yanked to the ground by the lei mid-triumphant dunk. FOUL! Which we don't remember, exactly, but we think that's the first one called. The crowd goes hushed, but applauds as Victorino gets up and heads to the line for his potentially game-clinching free throws...and of course sinks them both. But don't get too excited, Phillies fans - he celebrated by popping his new t-shirt line that he's been wearing to games. Sweet shirt, bro. Phillies win, 21-19.
Well, well, well, a couple of thrillers there! O's and Phitins for the 'ship...not too shabby if we say so ourselves. Let us play you out with the bracket to date:
Game 1: (5) Minnesota Twins vs. (13) Baltimore Orioles
Players: Joe Mauer/Pat Neshek vs. Matt Wieters/Brian Matusz
The Orioles are the lowest seed to advance this far in tournament history (admittedly, perhaps not the most impressive record), and have done so on the strength of Matt Wieters' phenomenal swag. The Twins have overcome a pair of formidable title contenders (Rangers, Yankees) because of Joe Mauer's dominance. We don't mind saying that this has been the most hotly anticipated pairing of the tournament; it's a regular ratings bonanza (relatively speaking). And from the outset, neither team disappoints. It's a flurry of stunning crossovers, no-look assists, clean jumpers, and lockdown defense. Paradoxical? Maybe. Entertaining? You bet. The game stays deadlocked most of the way, until the Orioles start to pull ahead late as Matusz asserts his dominance over Neshek. The O's jump to a 19-16 lead, but Mauer ties it up from 3 after a crazy side-armed assist from Neshek that snakes through the legs of the unsuspecting Matusz. Tied 19-19, and unwilling to go through another epic showdown like they just had against, the Orioles were in a crucial spot. But there's a reason why Matt Wieters already has a Hall of Fame plaque and Joe Mauer doesn't. The thunderous game-winning alley-oop that he throws down isn't that reason, but it's pretty indicative, no? Orioles win, 21-19.
Game 2: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (2) Philadelphia Phillies
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard
These may be the top two seeds, but they certainly got here in strange ways. The Phillies won one game by virtue of playing only against 5'6'' Danny Ray-Herrera and another by the Rockies' rulebook recklessness, while the Dodgers advanced last round because of Matt Kemp's midget stripper. What we're saying is, this could go either way. The Dodgers size advantage seems to hurt them early, as Victorino, seemingly unencumbered by the ceremonial lei he's been insisting on wearing, darts around nimbly as ever, finishing around the rim and from the perimeter with equal aplomb. Kemp heats up from deep, though, draining a couple of three-pointers to put the Dodgers right back in it. Howard and Broxton wage a battle for the ages down on the blocks, trading subtle elbows and jostling constantly. Hook shots and drop step-layups abound from down around the basket, until as with the earlier game, we stand deadlocked at 19. Victorino had been somewhat quiet, seemingly worn down, but he turned on the jets and streaked past a flatfooted Kemp on the way to the hole...only to find himself yanked to the ground by the lei mid-triumphant dunk. FOUL! Which we don't remember, exactly, but we think that's the first one called. The crowd goes hushed, but applauds as Victorino gets up and heads to the line for his potentially game-clinching free throws...and of course sinks them both. But don't get too excited, Phillies fans - he celebrated by popping his new t-shirt line that he's been wearing to games. Sweet shirt, bro. Phillies win, 21-19.
Well, well, well, a couple of thrillers there! O's and Phitins for the 'ship...not too shabby if we say so ourselves. Let us play you out with the bracket to date:
2/22/10
MLB Jam: NL Semi-Finals
ARE YOU READY?!
WE SAAAAAID, ARE YOU READY?!
WE CAN'T HEEEEEEAAR YOU!!!!!
It's not often we get to say those things in public, and this is about as close as we're gonna get. So even though we clearly cannot hear you (or...can we...?) we're going to assume that you're as excited for the Final Four of the MLB Jam tournament to be unveiled. So why waste time? Games to 21, 2's and 3's, call own fouls, and LLLLLLLEEEEETTTT'S GET REAAAADY TOOOOOO play basketball.
We really need a hype man.
Game 1: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (12) Houston Astros
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Michael Bourn/Evan Engelbrook
Can we tell you a brief story? We're not really sure if it's blog-appropriate, but it's very relevant, we assure you. Matt Kemp, a.k.a. the anchor of that Dodgers squad (seriously; we don't think we remember writing one thing about what Broxton did beyond 'being big'), dates Rihanna. And it was her birthday over the weekend. We're sure you know where this is going, but play along: guess what he got her for the occasion!
We'll wait.
Did you guess 'midget stripper?' Cause if you did, well, we like having you around these parts. We say this story is relevant because we don't really comme on dit 'like' the Astros, and so in lieu of a game recap, you get a midget in leather lingerie. Trust us, it's better this way. Dodgers win by virtue of midget.
Game 2: (3) Colorado Rockies vs. (2) Philadelphia Phillies
Players: Dexter Fowler/Greg Reynolds vs. Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard
Some bad blood between these squads, because not only did Shane not get Dexter a midget stripper for his birthday, but the Rox and Phils have met in the playoffs two of the past three years.
Somehow those are related.
ANYWAY, the two squads appear fairly evenly matched because Fowler/Victorino are analogs and Reynolds, while he has a height advantage on Howard, surrenders quite a bit in the weight department. And so but what was supposed to be a compelling match full of drama and competitive basketball quickly turns into bizarre theater as Carlos Gonzalez suits up in place of Fowler and runs roughshod over Victorino and Howard. Unfortunately, this is what we like to call 'unabashed and thorough violation of the sacred MLB Jam covenant' (our rulebook is a real fun read), and the Phils aren't about to let that go. By virtue of Howard saying 'Hey, that's not Dexter Fowler!' the Rockies are forced to forfeit their ill-gotten gains. So much for Rock-bruary! Phillies win by forfeit and the Rockies are cheaters.
Well, that was different! But, hey, we have a final four! And somehow the 1 and 2 seed from the NL have made it out unscathed. Mauer! Wieters! Howard! Midget Stri- Kemp! It's the MLB Jam Final Four!
WE SAAAAAID, ARE YOU READY?!
WE CAN'T HEEEEEEAAR YOU!!!!!
It's not often we get to say those things in public, and this is about as close as we're gonna get. So even though we clearly cannot hear you (or...can we...?) we're going to assume that you're as excited for the Final Four of the MLB Jam tournament to be unveiled. So why waste time? Games to 21, 2's and 3's, call own fouls, and LLLLLLLEEEEETTTT'S GET REAAAADY TOOOOOO play basketball.
We really need a hype man.
Game 1: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (12) Houston Astros
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Michael Bourn/Evan Engelbrook
Can we tell you a brief story? We're not really sure if it's blog-appropriate, but it's very relevant, we assure you. Matt Kemp, a.k.a. the anchor of that Dodgers squad (seriously; we don't think we remember writing one thing about what Broxton did beyond 'being big'), dates Rihanna. And it was her birthday over the weekend. We're sure you know where this is going, but play along: guess what he got her for the occasion!
We'll wait.
Did you guess 'midget stripper?' Cause if you did, well, we like having you around these parts. We say this story is relevant because we don't really comme on dit 'like' the Astros, and so in lieu of a game recap, you get a midget in leather lingerie. Trust us, it's better this way. Dodgers win by virtue of midget.
Game 2: (3) Colorado Rockies vs. (2) Philadelphia Phillies
Players: Dexter Fowler/Greg Reynolds vs. Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard
Some bad blood between these squads, because not only did Shane not get Dexter a midget stripper for his birthday, but the Rox and Phils have met in the playoffs two of the past three years.
Somehow those are related.
ANYWAY, the two squads appear fairly evenly matched because Fowler/Victorino are analogs and Reynolds, while he has a height advantage on Howard, surrenders quite a bit in the weight department. And so but what was supposed to be a compelling match full of drama and competitive basketball quickly turns into bizarre theater as Carlos Gonzalez suits up in place of Fowler and runs roughshod over Victorino and Howard. Unfortunately, this is what we like to call 'unabashed and thorough violation of the sacred MLB Jam covenant' (our rulebook is a real fun read), and the Phils aren't about to let that go. By virtue of Howard saying 'Hey, that's not Dexter Fowler!' the Rockies are forced to forfeit their ill-gotten gains. So much for Rock-bruary! Phillies win by forfeit and the Rockies are cheaters.
Well, that was different! But, hey, we have a final four! And somehow the 1 and 2 seed from the NL have made it out unscathed. Mauer! Wieters! Howard! Midget Stri- Kemp! It's the MLB Jam Final Four!
2/11/10
MLB Jam: NL Round 2
Sorry for the delay, folks. Let's pretend that it's because of...snowstorms! Yeah, that's it. No one could make it out to the court because there was just too much snow. Happens, y'know? In any event, let's get hoppin to make up for the delay. As always, games to 21, win by 2, 2's and 3's, call own fouls.
Game 1: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (9) Milwaukee Brewers
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Carlos Gomez/Yovani Gallardo
The famed OF/RHP combinations butt heads here, and like with the Brewers' first-round matchup, it really comes down to whether or not Carlos Gomez can use his speed to beat the burly Kemp/Broxton duo. Unfortunately, Kemp is far faster than Carlos Zambrano or Sean Marshall, and Jon Broxton...is a large man. Gallardo is effective from deep since Broxton can't close out on him, but Kemp shuts down Gomez and scores on a few sweet alley-oops. Dodgers win, 22-16.
Game 2: (4) St. Louis Cardinals vs. (12) Houston Astros
Players: Albert Pujols/Adam Wainwright vs. Michael Bourn/Evan Engelbrook
Oddsmakers loved the Cardinals before this one (what, what we have to make money off this somehow), by virtue of Mr. Pujols. But Michael Bourn had more success than Carlos Gomez with the speed game, since Matt Kemp is more fleet of foot than Pujols. The 6'9'' Engelbrook held it down on the blocks, blocking Wainwright time and time again, and a cold streak from Pujols saw his team down double digits early. But they came roaring back on the strength of a few three-pointers and timely boards to tie the game at 19. All the momentum was on the Cards' side...until Bourn crossed Pujols out of his shoes and hit a pretty finger roll for the shocking clincher. Astros win, 21-19.
Game 3: (3) Colorado Rockies vs. (11) San Diego Padres
Players: Dexter Fowler/Greg Reynolds vs. David Eckstein/Kyle Blanks
The Padres established themselves as a duo that was not to be trifled with in the wake of their 6/11 upset, and things started well for them again when Eckstein dove for consecutive loose balls and hit Blanks in the post for a quick four points. It was then that the Rockies realized the key to beating the Padres was simply to not let the ball hit the ground, thereby denying Eckstein the chance to show off his grit and determination. The Padres would never score again, and Greg Reynolds scored the last point after yo-yoing the ball over Eckstein's head like a cat toy. Because Greg's a dick. Rockies win, 21-4.
Game 4: (10) Cincinnati Reds vs. (2) Philadelphia Phillies
Players: Danny Ray-Herrera/Willy Taveras/Chris Sabo vs. Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard
The weirdness continues for the Reds, who, as you may remember, were forced to play sans Taveras and plus Sabo last round. Oddly, this worked, but after some hushed discussions and a few dollars changing hands, it was ruled that Sabo was ineligible as well, since he's as much a Red as Taveras. So Dr. H (get it??) had to go it alone, which wouldn't be so bad if he weren't 5'6'' in his Reebok Pumps (he's an old school doctor). Victorino and Howard make short work of the minute medicine man, but let's all consider it a victory for him that Herrera managed to throw one down over Howard's head. Sure, he was on Victorino's shoulders, but it was still touching. Phillies win, 21-2.
Well now if you don't think that was thrilling, you don't have a pulse. Never mind the fact that losing teams scored a combined 6 points in the last two games, if you don't mind - what matters is that we're down to the Elite 8 (trademarked? No? Good.) (but if it is, don't tell us). Not long to go now, folks! Allow us to play you out with the updated bracket:
Game 1: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (9) Milwaukee Brewers
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Carlos Gomez/Yovani Gallardo
The famed OF/RHP combinations butt heads here, and like with the Brewers' first-round matchup, it really comes down to whether or not Carlos Gomez can use his speed to beat the burly Kemp/Broxton duo. Unfortunately, Kemp is far faster than Carlos Zambrano or Sean Marshall, and Jon Broxton...is a large man. Gallardo is effective from deep since Broxton can't close out on him, but Kemp shuts down Gomez and scores on a few sweet alley-oops. Dodgers win, 22-16.
Game 2: (4) St. Louis Cardinals vs. (12) Houston Astros
Players: Albert Pujols/Adam Wainwright vs. Michael Bourn/Evan Engelbrook
Oddsmakers loved the Cardinals before this one (what, what we have to make money off this somehow), by virtue of Mr. Pujols. But Michael Bourn had more success than Carlos Gomez with the speed game, since Matt Kemp is more fleet of foot than Pujols. The 6'9'' Engelbrook held it down on the blocks, blocking Wainwright time and time again, and a cold streak from Pujols saw his team down double digits early. But they came roaring back on the strength of a few three-pointers and timely boards to tie the game at 19. All the momentum was on the Cards' side...until Bourn crossed Pujols out of his shoes and hit a pretty finger roll for the shocking clincher. Astros win, 21-19.
Game 3: (3) Colorado Rockies vs. (11) San Diego Padres
Players: Dexter Fowler/Greg Reynolds vs. David Eckstein/Kyle Blanks
The Padres established themselves as a duo that was not to be trifled with in the wake of their 6/11 upset, and things started well for them again when Eckstein dove for consecutive loose balls and hit Blanks in the post for a quick four points. It was then that the Rockies realized the key to beating the Padres was simply to not let the ball hit the ground, thereby denying Eckstein the chance to show off his grit and determination. The Padres would never score again, and Greg Reynolds scored the last point after yo-yoing the ball over Eckstein's head like a cat toy. Because Greg's a dick. Rockies win, 21-4.
Game 4: (10) Cincinnati Reds vs. (2) Philadelphia Phillies
Players: Danny Ray-Herrera/
The weirdness continues for the Reds, who, as you may remember, were forced to play sans Taveras and plus Sabo last round. Oddly, this worked, but after some hushed discussions and a few dollars changing hands, it was ruled that Sabo was ineligible as well, since he's as much a Red as Taveras. So Dr. H (get it??) had to go it alone, which wouldn't be so bad if he weren't 5'6'' in his Reebok Pumps (he's an old school doctor). Victorino and Howard make short work of the minute medicine man, but let's all consider it a victory for him that Herrera managed to throw one down over Howard's head. Sure, he was on Victorino's shoulders, but it was still touching. Phillies win, 21-2.
Well now if you don't think that was thrilling, you don't have a pulse. Never mind the fact that losing teams scored a combined 6 points in the last two games, if you don't mind - what matters is that we're down to the Elite 8 (trademarked? No? Good.) (but if it is, don't tell us). Not long to go now, folks! Allow us to play you out with the updated bracket:
2/2/10
MLB Jam: NL 1st Round
After an action-packed first day of the epic tournament known far and wide as MLB Jam - and hopefully MLB Properties doesn't sue me for calling it that! - it's time for the senior circuit to have their day of first-round glory. And, hey, it comes on their 134th birthday! We've never been fond of postponing birthday celebrations, so let's get right to the hoopin' action. Games to 21, 2's and 3's, win by 2, call own fouls and we're off!
Game 1: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (16) Washington Nationals
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Adam Dunn/Nyjer Morgan
This game is probably the closest 1/16 matchup that's ever happened. You're essentially looking at the same team - Kemp and Morgan and Broxton and Dunn are essentially analogs. Morgan's got a big more speed than Kemp, but Broxton has a size (both height and weight) advantage on Dunn. Ultimately, though, we think Kemp channels some LeBron and drives the lane for a game-winner over Morgan. Dodgers win 21-19.
Game 2: (8) Chicago Cubs vs. (9) Milwaukee Brewers
Players: Carlos Zambrano/Sean Marshall vs. Carlos Gomez/Yovani Gallardo
Lots of Latin flavor in this matchup! Zambrano and Marshall are a fairly plodding group, while Gomez is one of the fastest players in the league. We think Gomez does a little A.I. impression, scampering all over the court underneath and around Big Z and Medium M. Yovani hits a three-ball here and there to keep them balanced, and the Brewers cruise. Brewers win 21-14.
Game 3: (4) St. Louis Cardinals vs. (13) New York Mets
Players: Albert Pujols/Adam Wainwright vs. Gary Matthews, Jr/Mike Pelfrey
Matthews is old and washed-up and Pelfrey is tall. Pujols is a Hall of Famer in his prime and Wainwright is tall. You can guess what happens here. Cardinals win 21-6.
Game 4: (5) San Francisco Giants vs. (12) Houston Astros
Players: Pablo Sandoval/Tim Lincecum vs. Michael Bourn/Evan Engelbrook
Shocking that the Giants pulled a 5 seed, we know. Also shocking is the inclusion of Engelbrook, whose existence remains unconfirmed to us. But if the man exists, he stands a whopping 6'8'', which we're fairly sure (we don't believe in research, so you can fact check this yourself) is taller than Sandoval and Lincecum put together. Plus, neither Sandoval nor Lincecum is capable of keeping up with Bourn's wheels. And, if you like cheap shot jokes, feel free to imagine Lincecum taking a mid-game smoke break then partaking in a team buffet with the Panda. Whether you do or not, the game doesn't go well for the Giants. Astros win, 21-10.
Game 5: (3) Colorado Rockies vs. (14) Arizona Diamondbacks
Players: Dexter Fowler/Greg Reynolds vs. Justin Upton/Dan Haren
Another matchup where the two teams are very even. Fowler and Upton are both uber-athletic guys, and Reynolds and Haren are both commanding post presences. Well, you know, for purposes of this game, they are. Buuut the Rockies do enjoy a size advantage here, with the 6'4'' Fowler and 6'7'' Reynolds both standing taller than their respective analogs, which is the difference in a tight contest. Rockies win, 21-17.
Game 6: (6) Florida Marlins vs. (11) San Diego Padres
Players: Josh Johnson/Sean West vs. Kyle Blanks/David Eckstein
The Marlins are, collectively, the tallest team in this contest by a long shot, with their guys measuring in at 6'7'' and 6'8'' respectgively. Blanks, however, is also 6'7'' and is relatively speedy for a 300 pounder. Plus...he's got an afro that clearly channels the spirit of Dr. J. Shockingly, the modestly-sized-if-we're-being-kind Eckstein grits and grinds and hustles his way to 15 of the team's 21 points, and dives for no fewer than 26 loose balls. What a gamer, that guy. Makes even us abandon the height favoritism we showed in just the last capsule we wrote. Padres win, 22-18.
Game 7: (7) Atlanta Braves vs. (10) Cincinnati Reds
Players: Tommy Hanson/Yunel Escobar vs. Danny Ray-Herrera/Willy Taveras/Chris Sabo
Ooof...and this is why you don't set lineups early. Since Taveras was traded - and DFA'd - yesterday, he is no longer eligible to play. But then! Just when DRH is getting ready to play singlehanded, who should walk through the door but Chris Sabo! The onetime Red with the goofy goggles, Sabo's inspiring entrance completely deflates the Braves squad - particularly since the goggles rend Sabo invincible to Escobar's mounting frustrations and cheap shots. Esco eventually storms off the court in anger, leaving Hanson to fend for himself. Unsurprisingly, it doesn't go well. Reds win, 21-11.
Game 8: (2) Philadelphia Phillies vs. (15) Pittsburgh Pirates
Players: Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard vs. Andrew McCutchen/Garrett Jones
Easily the most entertaining contest of the first round, Victorino and McCutchen trade running floaters and in the lane and dazzling moves on the perimeter while Howard and Jones counter with jump hooks, ferocious dunks, and powerfully swatted shots. Victorino earns his nickname in overtime, though, as the Hawaiian-bred baller flies over McCutchen's head for a posterizing finish to an epic battle. Phillies win, 30-27.
So let's check out that bracket now:
Lookin good! And a couple of big upsets, to boot - how 'bout that Eckstein fellow! First round MVP, eh? Tomorrow we'll have a couple of exciting divisional matchups in the AL side...can the upstart Rays topple the formidable Yankees? Can Seattle dethrone the Angels? We'll be on hand to tell you exactly what happens in those battles and more!
Game 1: (1) Los Angeles Dodgers vs. (16) Washington Nationals
Players: Matt Kemp/Jon Broxton vs. Adam Dunn/Nyjer Morgan
This game is probably the closest 1/16 matchup that's ever happened. You're essentially looking at the same team - Kemp and Morgan and Broxton and Dunn are essentially analogs. Morgan's got a big more speed than Kemp, but Broxton has a size (both height and weight) advantage on Dunn. Ultimately, though, we think Kemp channels some LeBron and drives the lane for a game-winner over Morgan. Dodgers win 21-19.
Game 2: (8) Chicago Cubs vs. (9) Milwaukee Brewers
Players: Carlos Zambrano/Sean Marshall vs. Carlos Gomez/Yovani Gallardo
Lots of Latin flavor in this matchup! Zambrano and Marshall are a fairly plodding group, while Gomez is one of the fastest players in the league. We think Gomez does a little A.I. impression, scampering all over the court underneath and around Big Z and Medium M. Yovani hits a three-ball here and there to keep them balanced, and the Brewers cruise. Brewers win 21-14.
Game 3: (4) St. Louis Cardinals vs. (13) New York Mets
Players: Albert Pujols/Adam Wainwright vs. Gary Matthews, Jr/Mike Pelfrey
Matthews is old and washed-up and Pelfrey is tall. Pujols is a Hall of Famer in his prime and Wainwright is tall. You can guess what happens here. Cardinals win 21-6.
Game 4: (5) San Francisco Giants vs. (12) Houston Astros
Players: Pablo Sandoval/Tim Lincecum vs. Michael Bourn/Evan Engelbrook
Shocking that the Giants pulled a 5 seed, we know. Also shocking is the inclusion of Engelbrook, whose existence remains unconfirmed to us. But if the man exists, he stands a whopping 6'8'', which we're fairly sure (we don't believe in research, so you can fact check this yourself) is taller than Sandoval and Lincecum put together. Plus, neither Sandoval nor Lincecum is capable of keeping up with Bourn's wheels. And, if you like cheap shot jokes, feel free to imagine Lincecum taking a mid-game smoke break then partaking in a team buffet with the Panda. Whether you do or not, the game doesn't go well for the Giants. Astros win, 21-10.
Game 5: (3) Colorado Rockies vs. (14) Arizona Diamondbacks
Players: Dexter Fowler/Greg Reynolds vs. Justin Upton/Dan Haren
Another matchup where the two teams are very even. Fowler and Upton are both uber-athletic guys, and Reynolds and Haren are both commanding post presences. Well, you know, for purposes of this game, they are. Buuut the Rockies do enjoy a size advantage here, with the 6'4'' Fowler and 6'7'' Reynolds both standing taller than their respective analogs, which is the difference in a tight contest. Rockies win, 21-17.
Game 6: (6) Florida Marlins vs. (11) San Diego Padres
Players: Josh Johnson/Sean West vs. Kyle Blanks/David Eckstein
The Marlins are, collectively, the tallest team in this contest by a long shot, with their guys measuring in at 6'7'' and 6'8'' respectgively. Blanks, however, is also 6'7'' and is relatively speedy for a 300 pounder. Plus...he's got an afro that clearly channels the spirit of Dr. J. Shockingly, the modestly-sized-if-we're-being-kind Eckstein grits and grinds and hustles his way to 15 of the team's 21 points, and dives for no fewer than 26 loose balls. What a gamer, that guy. Makes even us abandon the height favoritism we showed in just the last capsule we wrote. Padres win, 22-18.
Game 7: (7) Atlanta Braves vs. (10) Cincinnati Reds
Players: Tommy Hanson/Yunel Escobar vs. Danny Ray-Herrera/Willy Taveras/Chris Sabo
Ooof...and this is why you don't set lineups early. Since Taveras was traded - and DFA'd - yesterday, he is no longer eligible to play. But then! Just when DRH is getting ready to play singlehanded, who should walk through the door but Chris Sabo! The onetime Red with the goofy goggles, Sabo's inspiring entrance completely deflates the Braves squad - particularly since the goggles rend Sabo invincible to Escobar's mounting frustrations and cheap shots. Esco eventually storms off the court in anger, leaving Hanson to fend for himself. Unsurprisingly, it doesn't go well. Reds win, 21-11.
Game 8: (2) Philadelphia Phillies vs. (15) Pittsburgh Pirates
Players: Shane Victorino/Ryan Howard vs. Andrew McCutchen/Garrett Jones
Easily the most entertaining contest of the first round, Victorino and McCutchen trade running floaters and in the lane and dazzling moves on the perimeter while Howard and Jones counter with jump hooks, ferocious dunks, and powerfully swatted shots. Victorino earns his nickname in overtime, though, as the Hawaiian-bred baller flies over McCutchen's head for a posterizing finish to an epic battle. Phillies win, 30-27.
So let's check out that bracket now:
Lookin good! And a couple of big upsets, to boot - how 'bout that Eckstein fellow! First round MVP, eh? Tomorrow we'll have a couple of exciting divisional matchups in the AL side...can the upstart Rays topple the formidable Yankees? Can Seattle dethrone the Angels? We'll be on hand to tell you exactly what happens in those battles and more!
10/25/09
Season in Haiku: Philadelphia Phillies
Powerful lineup
Heads to the series again.
Cliff and Cole > CC?
6/9/09
Trimester Checkup: NL East
A couple days ago, we did our first installment of our Trimester Checkup, looking at the AL East. Today, we look at its senior circuit counterpart, the NL East.
1. Philadelphia Phillies, 33-22
2. New York Mets, 30-25
3. Atlanta Braves, 28-28
4. Florida Marlins, 25-31
5. Washington Nationals, 15-40
Biggest Surprise: Raul Ibanez. Ibanez has been mashing out of his mind this year, posting a .329/.386/.676 line with 19 dongers. His signing was widely panned this offseason, as one might reasonably question the wisdom of signing a 37-year old who's never lit the world on fire to a 3 year deal. But the investment has paid off in spades as Ibanez has helped carry the offense to a 3rd-best 5.5 runs per game. The offense, of course, has had to be great, since the pitching's not picking up any slack; the staff's allowing 4.78 runs per, good for 19th in the majors. We don't mean to insinuate there's anything wrong with J.A. Happ, but when he's leading your team in VORP, that can't mean good things. Luckily for the Phils, Cole Hamels looks like he's gotten his legs back under him, and...well...that's about all that's gone well for Phils pitching.
Biggest Disappointment: This is a tough one, but we're gonna say Jose Reyes. The Mets' sparkplug has been dealing with calf injuries all year, but is still posting a meager .279/.355/.379 line, and has been out-stolen by David Wright - who is having a disappointing year in his own right, thanks mostly to a surpressed line at home. They're gonna need him to step up if they want to make moves on the Phils and hold off the Braves, who we think are going to charge upward with the additions of Tommy Hanson, Kris Medlen, and Nate McLouth. Speaking of the Braves, we'd also like to mention Garret Anderson in the disappointment column, since he's been horrible. But...we can't say we're disappointed because, well, we weren't expecting anything. We just hope that the McLouth acquisition pushes old man Anderson to the bench. PERMANENTLY. If you know what we mean.
Biggest Question: Can the Mets get some quality pitching after Johan Santana? Livan Hernandez is currently second on the team in VORP, which is laughable to us. There's absolutely no way he can sustain anything resembling an above-average performance. So, someone's going to have to step up. John Maine needs to stop walking everyone he can, Mike Pelfrey's got to start trying to strike out anyone he can, and...well, Oliver Perez is beyond help.
Moves We Think Should Be Made:
- The Phillies should trade RHP Kyle Kendrick and INF Pablo Ozuna to the Indians for INF Jhonny Peralta. The Phils have no depth up the middle, and Eric Bruntlett is an incapable defensive or offensive caddy for Jimmy Rollins. If Rollins keeps struggling and the team decides they need to take away some of his at-bats, then they're going to need to upgrade the position. Piggybacking off of our earlier trade suggestion for the Indians, they would have an available shortstop in Peralta who has shown consistent 20-25 HR pop, albeit with a sieve in place of a glove. Which is fine, we think, as long as he's playing backup duty.
- The Mets should trade OF Fernando Martinez, 3B Jefry Marte, and RHP Bobby Parnell to the Padres for RHP Jake Peavy. Assuming, of course, that Peavy will go to New York. Given his demonstrated willingness to use that no-trade clause for all it's worth, that's a definite question mark. If Peavy can't be had, they could turn to the Pirates for any of Zach Duke, Paul Maholm, Ian Snell, et al. The Pirates have a ton of young hurlers who all seem to be pitching over their heads thusfar and might make for trade bait. Alternatively, we don't see a lot on the pitching market.
- The Braves already made the move they needed to make by bringing in Nate McLouth and adding an actual Major League-caliber bat to their outfield. Now if they can jigger the playing time properly (say, so that Brandon Jones and Matt Diaz platoon in left, Gregor Blanco mans center, and McLouth slides to right; anything to get Jeff Francoeur and Garret Anderson off the field), that might be all they need to make a run at the division crown.
- The Marlins need to just stop with the Emilio Bonifacio nonsense. It's great that he had a fantastic first week, but so did Chris Shelton. Just toss him back to AAA and forget that he was even up. Chris Coghlan was a good callup, and since the Marlins only seem to work from within their organization unless they're trading guys away, we won't suggest that they do anything drastic. Like, say, upgrading their pitching. Which they need to do. Josh Johnson's great, Ricky Nolasco will come back to form, and Anibal Sanchez should post better numbers, but how long do you want to wait on that?
- The Nationals...where to begin? They already took Stephen Strasburg, so there's a big step toward relevancy. But they need so, so much more. My advice would be to flip Cristian Guzman to a team in need of a shortstop, and see if you can't get near-big league guys to keep building around Zimmerman and Dunn. Our best bet would be Cristian Guzman to the Cardinals for C Bryan Anderson and RHP Jess Todd. In them, you get two guys who, if you're desperate, can come play with the big boys by the end of the year. By the way, the Dunn signing never made sense to us. Why sign a slugger like that when your biggest strength is in the outfield, you already have issues assigning playing time, and you're not going to be a competitor anyway? Just save the money...especially since you're going to need it to pay Strasburg.
Prognostication: We see the Phillies repeating as champs. Ryan Howard looks like he's actually manging to put together an entire season of productive slugging, maintaining a .550+ SLG into June, Chase Utley has been excellent, and Raul Ibanez's decline should be offset by Jimmy Rollins rounding into form. If they can get some back-end pitching to help out their lineup's above-average output, they could be in good shape to make another run at the World Series. The Mets, despite their bullpen upgrades, are still lacking in the rotation and lineup as compared to the Phils, and can only boast a superior lineup when compared to the Braves. The Braves, in fact, should rise above the Mets and at least challenge the Phillies thanks to the addition of McLouth and healthy production from Brian McCann. The Marlins have room to improve, of course, what with all the youngsters they have. We'd like to see them call up Cameron Maybin and make like the Indians in the second half of last year. And hopefully the Nationals let Strasburg skip the minors, purely for the sake of our enjoyment. We're curious to see if anyone can really pull off that feat without turning into Chad Cordero.
Final Standings
1. Philadelphia Phillies
2. Atlanta Braves
3. New York Mets
4. Florida Marlins
5. Washington Nationals
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